I've been wanting to post for awhile but haven't known what to say. 2015 I'm sure not sad at all to see you go. This year has been so hard! Everything has turned out okay but it has just felt like it was a constant struggle after struggle after struggle. It has been funny with the end of the year coming to see how many of my family members have had the exact same thoughts about 2015 and are just as excited to see this year end.
So I haven't posted since May. I feel like I don't even know where to begin. Well Logan had his hearing test at the end of May and found that his ear drums weren't vibrating. This was probably due to scar tissue from all the ear infections he had last winter and this was causing him to not be able to hear well. When the speech therapist came and evaluated him he was performing at less than 1% of the things he should be doing.
The therapist we got has been so awesome though, she comes twice a month and worked with him on comprehension and socialization before speech. We started with sign language and he caught on really quick and has learned a bunch of signs. The comprehension part of his therapy was the most difficult part, his therapist thinks he wasn't understanding us at all when she started working with him. His speech was still nonexistent until about a month ago when actually started saying a few words! He had another hearing test in November and his eardrums were vibrating at a normal rate and he is totally understanding us. Logan is getting easier every day and is babbling and working on sounds like crazy. He has come so far but we still have a long road to go.
Lets see what else, so radiation was harder on my mom than she was expecting. It zapped her energy completely and that on top of recovering from chemo pretty much put her under. She went to work, went home and went to sleep. Even after radiation was over she has still been so tired. Summer was pretty rough on her and she spent most of it resting. She is getting stronger and stronger all the time but still gets exhausted after doing anything and none of us expected her to still be recovering at this point.
And then there have been issues with me. In July I went in to see an eye doctor because my vision was blurry. After not being able to get my eyes up to 20/20 they dilated my eyes and noticed that I had swelling on my optic nerves. They thought this was caused by swelling in my brain and sent me to get an MRI and a spinal tap. Getting news like this really rocked my world. Getting tested for brain tumors and horrible diseases and thinking the worst possibilities is so terrifying. Two days after we got this news a letter came in the mail telling us that our house appraised for $40,000 more than we paid for it. Matt and I freaked thinking holy crap what if this is happening so that if I have cancer and die Matt will be financially okay with the kids. Of course that's totally irrational but we were scared to death.
The MRI came back clean which was a huge relief so they did the spinal tap to test the pressure in my brain as well as to test me for MS, Crones disease and Rheumatoid Arthritis. The spinal tap came back normal as well and they discovered that the pressure in my brain was actually too low which caused the swelling.
I did not recover well from the spinal tap at all and got a horrible headache. I was down in bed for five days before the doctor let me come back in to get a blood patch over the place where they did the spinal tap. When I went in for the blood patch they did an x-ray on my back and noticed that the area I got my last epidural at was not sealed and was covered with scar tissue. The doctor did a blood patch on that area as well and my headache went away within just a few hours as well as all the back pain I have had since I had Logan. The doctors discovered that my headaches, back pain and failing vision was all from the bad epidural. It has taken several months but my migraines are almost gone, I'm not having back pain anymore and my lost vision has come back.
Matt also started a new job about a month and a half ago. It has been an absolute blessing and he loves his new job but changing jobs is always hard. Matt has been staying home with the boys on Tuesday mornings ever since my mom got cancer and then brought them to work at 11 and I took them home. Well with the new job this wasn't an option anymore and luckily my boss has let me switch to 4 10 hour shifts. The job is also in Provo so figuring out how to get the boys to and from daycare with me going in to work so early has been a little tricky but I think we have gotten a good system down. Matt is so much happier and so it has definitely been worth it.
Nathan has been the only one without issues this year and has been such an amazing kid. Right before he turned four it was like he grew up over night. The past few months have been amazing with him and he has been so well behaved and fun to have around. There have been times this year where I have almost lost it and Nathan has given me a big hug and told me to be happy and it has made all the difference in the world. There have been times where I have looked at him and just thought, Heavenly Father really knew what he was doing when he sent Nathan to our family.
So I guess all is well that ends well. It's almost like everything rough this year got tied up in a nice pretty bow for the end of the year. This Christmas season was really different for me, I guess you could say that I finally got the true meaning of Christmas. This year was so rough but I'm so glad that I wasn't alone and that we had the Lord guiding us through it all. To see how we have all grown through the challenges is pretty amazing but I sure would never want to relive the last year again.
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