Jungle Jims

After having Tuesdays off for almost a year, I unfortunately have to go back to working five days a week, starting next week.  Since yesterday was my last Tuesday off, the kids and I decided to make it special and went to Jungle Jims.  Oh My Goodness we had a blast.  I took the kids about a year ago and they liked it then, they freaking LOVED it this time.

Logan was finally big enough for the bumper cars! Kid could not figure out to push the pedal down until it was almost over but he sat in the corner, turning the steering wheel and grinning from ear to ear.  He kept saying so proudly, "I drove it Mommy, I drove it!"

The airplane thingamajigs are always a crowd pleaser.

Logan liked the swings more than Nathan, I think Nathan was a touch bored.

K, so somehow Logan pushed the buttons just so and turned this video game on without paying!  It was a Batman car racer type game and I even checked, it was not a demo, kiddo was really playing!

Nathan asked Logan for a turn and Logan so nicely said sure! and let Nathan have a go at it.  I think next time I will just pay the money and let them play since they both enjoyed it so much.

Oh the bounce houses!  There were three and I could not get the kids out of the bounce house play land for anything!  Except when they were starving and I bribed them with lunch.

Okay, there is this "rollercoaster" that actually goes around in a circle pretty stinking fast and then it goes backward.  Nathan actually asked to ride it and look at those smiles!  They both loved it and nobody cried.  They are getting so big and brave!

It was such a great day to just play and spend time with the kids.  They are getting big so fast I'm so glad we could go and make some awesome memories.  Nathan is already planning that his birthday party is going to be at Jungle Jims so it looks like we will be back soon!

I Love Having a Five Year Old

I love having a five year old...well an almost five year old.  Nathan has grown up so much this summer I can't even believe it.  Don't get me wrong, he was an awesome four year old.  But the past month or so he just seems so much older I guess.  It's like I have a little buddy who talks my ear off and tells me the greatest things ever!  Like for example, he learned about space and the planets at school a few weeks ago.  He has told me the name of every planet, what stars are made of, all about how you need a rocket ship to go to the planets, and did you know that there is "dry lava" on Mars?  Not hot lava but dry lava and that is why it's red.  I have no idea what dry lava is but I love hearing him talk about it so much!

And then there was this morning.  I was running late and hurrying to pack my lunch.  Nathan looked up and me and said "Mom, why are you so stressed?"  I told him that I had a lot of meetings today and it was going to be a rough day.  So then he asks me, "What is your first meeting?" I tell him its a project coordination meeting.  He asks me, "What's your second meeting?" So i tell him a parking construction meeting.  Then he asks, "What's your third meeting?"  I tell him I have to spend the afternoon at the city getting building permits.  He thought about it for a few minutes and tells me, ya mom you have a busy day,  I hope your day gets better soon.

I just love so much that he cared what I was doing, even though he has no idea what any of it means.  It just means the world that he takes the time to listen to people and cares about what is bothering them.  Nathan does this sort of thing all the time now.  He is just so thoughtful and kind and caring I can't even believe it.

When I dropped him off at school I gave him a kiss and hug and told him to have a great day.  He says to me, "Well Mom, I will have a good day, and then a great night when we are together again."  Talk about getting me to cry first thing in the morning.  I sure love my kids more than words can say.

"Your Kid Needs Behavioral Therapy"

There are no words for when your two and a half year old's daycare teacher tells you that your kid needs behavioral therapy.  I couldn't speak, I couldn't rebuttal, and the silence on my end of the phone call was apparently the opening for his teacher to give me the laundry list of all the times Logan has misbehaved.

My heart is breaking and I'm choking back the tears as I mutter something stupid about getting an appointment arranged.  It's not like Matt and I don't know that Logan struggles.  We do know.  We deal with it day and and day out.  We have been working with Logan and therapists for over a year now, first with social skills, then sign language, then speech.  We knew he was having some behavioral issues but honestly we were chalking it up to 2 year old behavior as well as him having been so far behind.

His speech therapist talked to us at the beginning of the summer about some of his issues and set up a meeting with us and the director of a special needs preschool.  When the director met Logan she was surprised he was even being evaluated but told us to have his daycare teacher fill out an evaluation and bring it back at the beginning of October.  I haven't given his teacher the paperwork yet, I was still hoping he would improve enough that the teacher would give him a good evaluation.  Guess that's not an option anymore....

I know its stupid to avoid reality.  If he needs help then he needs help.  If he has anger and behavior issues then they aren't going to go away by ignoring them.  And I know it is better to deal with these kind of problems now, before he gets into elementary school.  But his speech has gotten so good that I just really hoped everything else would fall into line as well.

I feel like Logan just gets labeled as a bad kid or aggressive or difficult without getting to know who Logan really is.  Yes, he gets aggressive, yes he can be very difficult and stubborn but he can also be the sweetest most loving kid I know.   

The Fourth of July

I love holidays, I just do.  I love planning for them and making themed desserts and buying matching outfits for the kids specifically for that holiday.  And Matt rolls his eyes at my insanity but still puts on a smile and goes with it.  And the Fourth of  July is no exception.  What has been really fun this year is to see my kids get so excited with me.


This year we decided to do our own fireworks on July 2nd with my sister Emily, her husband Chase and their daughter Paisley.  It was awesome!  Last year Paisley and Logan were afraid of the fireworks, this year they could not contain their excitement. 

Logan cracked me up, he was so serious about the fireworks all night!

We were running low on lighter fluid so the boys ran to the store for more.  They took too long so Emily and I lit off a few fireworks without them (and scared ourselves to death).

Matt of course had to rig a couple of fireworks.  It isnt' a firework show with Matt unless something explodes.

Matt headed out of town Sunday night for a four wheeling trip so it was just me and the kids.  Our neighbors across the street started setting off huge aerial fireworks around 10:00 which woke up the kids so we headed outside in our lawn chairs and watched the most amazing firework show ever!  I was disappointed that Matt missed it but had fun with the kiddos.


On the 4th Matt was still four wheeling so the kids and I headed to Raging Waters with my mom.  I love going to the pool on the 4th because it's not too crowded and still gets us outside without dying from the heat at the park.  After lunch the kids and I headed home for naps and then went to my mom's house for dinner.  We then went home and just watched fireworks from our neighborhood which seriously did not disappoint.  People in our neighborhood are very serious about their fireworks and we had another amazing firework show.

He was such a good sport to let me take his picture.

Logan pouting because he did NOT want his picture taken by the flag.

Logan loved the poppers!



The Fourth of July is such a fun holiday but it is also such a good reminder to be grateful to live in America and to have our freedom.  It reminds me how much I love my country and how grateful I am to the men and women who fight every day to keep us free. 

Life is Good

To say that life is good right now would be an understatement.  Things are just....really good.  Really busy but really good.  Matt is loving his new job down in Provo.  Even though he is gone more and the commute is long he is happier there than he ever was at his old job.  But he is gone a lot!  Last week he worked late every night and didn't get home until 7:30 or 8:00.  But the kids and I are adjusting to having him gone more and are making it work. When Matt worked for UPMA he cooked dinner every single night while I bathed the kids or cleaned the house or what not.  Well with him working so much we are having cereal for dinner a lot more but the kids couldn't be happier about it.


Nathan is doing really great too.  He has grown up so much in the last six months.  He was a really hard three year old but has been a fantastic four year old.  He is getting more independent and better about listening and getting his chores done.  He has also gotten really sweet again.  The other day he went to the backyard and picked a few dandelions.  When he came back inside he told me that he picked beautiful flowers for his beautiful mom.  I will admit it, I definitely cried. 


And Logan is talking!  Like seriously talking!  He is saying words like crazy and is putting two and sometimes three words together at a time.  He can say just about any word that you tell him to now.  Logan is starting to have conversations with Nathan and the two of them are playing so much better now that Logan can talk.  He is still working with the speech therapist twice a month but hopefully we will only have to for a few more months.  Logan said I love you for the first time last week and just about melted my heart.  I'm so proud of how hard my little guy has worked at talking over the last few months.


Things have been good with me too.  Work is going pretty good, my boss switched some things around giving me and my coworker more responsibility and more independence.  I'm really enjoying running construction projects  by myself and have got several in the new 111 building that is being constructed.  It's stressful but I feel like I'm learning a lot and getting more confident in managing projects.


Of course the best part of my days are when I'm home with the kids and I got really lucky a few months ago with a schedule change.  I'm doing four 10 hour shifts instead of five days a week and it has made the biggest difference!  I feel like I'm getting so much more time with my kids and can balance everything better.  It is supposed to be temporary but my boss said that as long as no one complains I can keep going with it!  I'm totally looking forward to being able to take the kids to the pool during the week instead of just on Saturdays now.


And the big news......WE ARE GOING TO DISNEYLAND!  Not until June and Matt isn't going to come but my family is all going so Matt agreed to let the kids and I go.  I'm so excited and I think the boys are just going to love it.  Half the fun of a big vacation is getting to anticipate and plan for it and it's so nice to have something awesome to look forward to.


So that's the jest of what has been going on in our lives.  Hopefully I can start keeping this blog updated instead of writing once every four months.  No promises though...

Christmas

We had the best Christmas ever this year!  I took the whole week of Christmas off and had so much fun just getting to spend time with the boys.  It was nice to not be so busy and have time to do the fun Christmas stuff.  And with the kids getting older it was so fun to watch their excitement and anticipation for Christmas.

Here are my cute boys the Sunday before Christmas.   My mom got them the cutest Christmas ties and Nathan was all about it and couldn't wait to show the kids in primary.  Logan took a big more coaxing but he was a good sport and they  both looked so handsome!

Nathan is such a sweet heart and said okay mom now get one of us together!  I sure do love my little man.

The Tuesday before Christmas we went to the Christmas in Color display at the Olympic Oval and my goodness it did not disappoint.  They said there were almost a million LED lights that were synced to Christmas music.  And you drove through it and put your radio on their station and it seriously took us about 25 minutes to drive through it.  The kids loved all the lights and little Logan kept saying ooo and awwww everytime we turned the car and he saw something new. 

Oh Wednesday we all made sugar cookies and gingerbread cookies and decorated them as a family.  I was amazed at how much the kids got in to it and were particular about which sprinkles they wanted on which cookie.  Logan frosted a bit, then ate sprinkles, then ate his whole cookie and then asked for another one.  I think he went through three cookies!  It was so fun to do it as a family.

On Thursday (Christmas Eve) the boys and I did our yearly trip to Gardner Village to see the elves.  This was our third time going and is one of my favorite parts about Christmas.  Logan was such a ham and would say hi hi hi to every single elf that he saw.  It was freezing so I hustled the boys through everything in about a half an hour and when I started leading them back to the car they both begged to go back through and see the elves again.  An hour and a half later we were all completely frozen but definitely in the Christmas spirit.

Christmas Eve we headed out to Lehi to the annual Kasteler fondue party.  I didn't get any pictures but the boys had so much fun playing with all the kids and Nathan loved the chocolate fondue.  Logan wasn't feeling great so we headed out early which was perfect because the boys were in bed by 8:30.  Nathan was so cute on the way home from the party, he kept saying "Mom, did you hear that?  I think I just heard Santa's bells!"  He went right to bed and told me to go to bed too so that Santa would hurry up and come.

Christmas morning was so much fun.  The boys were so excited to come down the stairs and see that Santa had eaten their cookies and drank their squeeze-it and left so many presents under the tree.  We did their stockings and every present Nathan opened he would yell Thank you Santa or Thank you mom and dad!  Santa brought each of the boys a build a bear, paw patrol dogs and color changer cars.  Matt and I gave Nathan a remote control car, a light saber, books and Legos.  Logan got a kitchen, dishes, a toaster and a color pad.  We did cinnamon rolls for breakfast and Nathan couldn't eat fast enough so that he could try out his color changer cars.  I think they were his favorite gift this Christmas.

The rest of the day was spent visiting our parents and spending time with our siblings.  We got home around 5 that night and spent the rest of the night playing with the kids and relaxing.  The kids went to bed by about 7:00 that night and Matt and I watched a movie and went to bed early.  It was such a great Christmas! 

2015

I've been wanting to post for awhile but haven't known what to say.  2015 I'm sure not sad at all to see you go.  This year has been so hard! Everything has turned out okay but it has just felt like it was a constant struggle after struggle after struggle.  It has been funny with the end of the year coming to see how many of my family members have had the exact same thoughts about 2015 and are just as excited to see this year end. 


So I haven't posted since May.  I feel like I don't even know where to begin.  Well Logan had his hearing test at the end of May and found that his ear drums weren't vibrating.  This was probably due to scar tissue from all the ear infections he had last winter and this was causing him to not be able to hear well.  When the speech therapist came and evaluated him he was performing at less than 1% of the things he should be doing. 


The therapist we got has been so awesome though, she comes twice a month and worked with him on comprehension and socialization before speech.  We started with sign language and he caught on really quick and has learned a bunch of signs.  The comprehension part of his therapy was the most difficult part, his therapist thinks he wasn't understanding us at all when she started working with him.  His speech was still nonexistent until about a month ago when actually started saying a few words!  He had another hearing test in November and his eardrums were vibrating at a normal rate and he is totally understanding us.  Logan is getting easier every day and is babbling and working on sounds like crazy.  He has come so far but we still have a long road to go.


Lets see what else, so radiation was harder on my mom than she was expecting.  It zapped her energy completely and that on top of recovering from chemo pretty much put her under.  She went to work, went home and went to sleep.  Even after radiation was over she has still been so tired.  Summer was pretty rough on her and she spent most of it resting.  She is getting stronger and stronger all the time but still gets exhausted after doing anything and none of us expected her to still be recovering at this point.


And then there have been issues with me.  In July I went in to see an eye doctor because my vision was blurry.  After not being able to get my eyes up to 20/20 they dilated my eyes and noticed that I had swelling on my optic nerves.  They thought this was caused by swelling in my  brain and sent me to get an MRI and a spinal tap.  Getting news like this really rocked my world.  Getting tested for brain tumors and horrible diseases and thinking the worst possibilities is so terrifying.  Two days after we got this news a letter came in the mail telling us that our house appraised for $40,000 more than we paid for it.  Matt and I freaked thinking holy crap what if this is happening so that if I have cancer and die Matt will be financially okay with the kids.  Of course that's totally irrational but we were scared to death.


The MRI came back clean which was a huge relief so they did the spinal tap to test the pressure in my brain as well as to test me for MS, Crones disease and Rheumatoid Arthritis.  The spinal tap came back normal as well and they discovered that the pressure in my brain was actually too low which caused the swelling. 


I did not recover well from the spinal tap at all and got a horrible headache.  I was down in bed for five days before the doctor let me come back in to get a blood patch over the place where they did the spinal tap.  When I went in for the blood patch they did an x-ray on my back and noticed that the area I got my last epidural at was not sealed and was covered with scar tissue.  The doctor did a blood patch on that area as well and my headache went away within just a few hours as well as all the back pain I have had since I had Logan.  The doctors discovered that my headaches, back pain and failing vision was all from the bad epidural.  It has taken several months but my migraines are almost gone, I'm not having back pain anymore and my lost vision has come back.


Matt also started a new job about a month and a half ago.  It has been an absolute blessing and he loves his new job but changing jobs is always hard.  Matt has been staying home with the boys on Tuesday mornings  ever since my mom got cancer and then brought them to work at 11 and I took them home.  Well with the new job this wasn't an option anymore and luckily my boss has let me switch to 4 10 hour shifts.  The job is also in Provo so figuring out how to get the boys to and from daycare with me going in to work so early has been a little tricky but I think we have gotten a good system down.  Matt is so much happier and so it has definitely been worth it.


Nathan has been the only one without issues this year and has been such an amazing kid.  Right before he turned four it was like he grew up over night.  The past few months have been amazing with him and he has been so well  behaved and fun to have around.  There have been times this year where I have almost lost it and Nathan has given me a big hug and told me to be happy and it has made all the difference in the world.  There have been times where I have looked at him and just thought, Heavenly Father really knew what he was doing when he sent Nathan to our family.


So I guess all is well that ends well.  It's almost like everything rough this year got tied up in a nice pretty bow for the end of the year.  This Christmas season was really different for me, I guess you could say that I finally got the true meaning of Christmas.  This year was so rough but I'm so glad that I wasn't alone and that we had the Lord guiding us through it all.  To see how we have all grown through the challenges is pretty amazing but I sure would never want to relive the last year again.